Whose Party is it Anyway?

        Many elements must come together to create a successful event. These include not only things like flowers and limos, but people. These are the vendors hired to work together to bring the event to life.  A true professional is concerned with making sure their part is executed as planned or at least as it was presented to the client.  But every now and then there's a vendor who feels that their role is more important than everything else and has no regard or respect for everyone esle... including the client.  Their agenda; to get their job done no matter whoose toes they step on.  This is the story of a sweet 16 and the dance choreographer.  Total dominance was the agenda of the evening for the dance choreographer who we'll call Katrina.  A fitting name, given her destructive nature and lots of hot air.  Here's how things unfolded. 

       Everything was ready, guests had begun to walk into the dining room which was beautifully decorated for a winter wonderland theme.  Snowflakes hung from the center, and we projected snow flake patterns in key areas, against blue uplighting.  Having just reviewed some final details with the Sweet 16 girl's parents, I  was walking back to the DJ booth to go over some last minute changes with the DJ and noticed an unknown person standing there.  As I approached, all eyes were on me... she introduced herself and stted "This is what's going down today!  You need to pick whatever song you want for the parents to walk in, and the kids are going to walk into the song on this CD. blah blah blah." When she finished I began to review with her what we had planned.. Light Show, Introductions, etc. She responded.." Light show? what's that? you need to do that later. You must play the intro song with vocals, and you should NOT say their names, it might throw them off". 

      Huh?? Not say their names? Intro music with Vocals?? No light sow!!" What was going on here?  I started to explain how we normally do the intros and soon realized she was not interested in my point of view "I've been doing this for fifteen years"she stated. "My husband, he's also a DJ and we never worry about introductions, we wait until later to say their names. If you would have come to the rehearsals, this would not be an issue."  Now, I am always open for new ways of doing things, but they must make sense and be in the best interest of the party and the host and hostess.  The "its my way or the highway" attitude does not fly with me. I don't attend rehearsals, because, from past experience, they usually get no where and in the end are a waste of my time. 

       I noticed my assistant who had been standing next to me saw the look on my face and decided to discretely walk away. Things were heating up.

       At the point, all I was thinking about was the Sweet16 girl and her parents. We had become close during the planning process and not only was she one of the sweetest girls I have met, she was career oriented, family oriented and her parents were both GEMS. A beautiful family who worked hard to put this event together and I was going to make sure it was the best ever. She deserved it.

One thing I have learned after doing this for 20+ year is you can't argue with stupid people. I tried to be witty, but whatever I said was just going over her head so I just told her I would find someway of making it work. Five minutes later the mom approaches me and told me  "Katrina just told me that you were trying to ruin the party. Don't worry about her. You do whatever you need to do. She has been giving me and kids problems and I can't wait for her to go home".  

My response was simply "My goal is to make this party an incredible celebration, All I want is for you and your daughter to have the best time of your lives ad I am going to make sure that happens."  Sounds corny but I really meant it.

       The event started. The light show was met with thunderous applause. Guests were pumped. We selected one of our own produced tracks, something tropical but upbeat for the parents.  This was followed by the song with vocals as "instructed" by Katrina. 

The choreography had each couple in the court of honor walking in one at a time and doing some type of fashion show cat walk when they reached the dance floor. I think. It looked very busy. One this I did notice was that guests (as is expected) had their eyes glued to the entrance and not on the dance floor.  The audience looked confused since the couples were entering without being formerly introduced.  To end the confusion and at least stimulate the guests to clap for each couple,  I went ahead and stated their names.   At some point right before the Sweet 16 girl was introduced, the choreographer runs back to the DJ booth and tells the DJ "You f--  up the whole thing up". The DJ completely ignored her. Everything looked fine to me.

        At one point Katrina blew onto the dance floor and  pushed the photographer out of the way. What was that all about? He was standing on the corner of the dance floor... not in anyone's way.  My jaw dropped. 

       When we introduced the sweet 16 girl, Katrina grabed the father's arm  and pushed him into position. He gave her a wierd look. She was out of control. 

During the court's two dances she looked frustrated and gave them dirty looks and yelled at them if they missed a step.  No one except her noticed the missed steps and I thought the teens danced great! I also found out later she had tried to take control during a pre-event meeting at the caterer's. The matre'd told me they had to put her in her place!

       At the end of the party, the sweet 16 girl and her parents told me they had the time of their lives. Everyone was happy. The party turned out so much better than they imagined. They loved the introductions and even the teens themselves were happy with the way the dances turned out.

     Miss Katrina I am sure felt otherwise... but who cares.

   So what do you think? How would you have handled this? What would you do if you were the Parent, DJ, or even photographer who got pushed?

Jose G